Saturday, 16 March 2013

Love what you have or have what you love?

Maybe they are the same thing? Or maybe you should aim for a bit of both?
So,
Should you learn to love what you've got? Is acceptance the only route to contentment, fulfilment and happiness? Do you have to learn to love what you have now before you can ever love what you may have in the future?
Or,
Is acceptance defeatist? Does loving what you've got hold you back from pursuing your dreams? Can you only really be happy if you push yourself to your limits, never settling for less than the best you can achieve? Should you keep searching if something doesn't feel quite right?

Can you find happiness? Or is it something you have to learn?
Tell me what you think and I'll give you a Cookie!*

*Note:
People giving their opinions twice will not receive 2 cookies, 1 cookie per opinion only.
No gushing, it's a philosophical question, man up!
Cookies will be credited upon my return, no sooner.

12 comments:

  1. Neither, and a bit of both!

    Sometimes you can love to the very core of your soul but still have to let that person or thing go.

    If you just accept what you have got and learn to love that, it can lead to a lack of fulfillment: if you are a dream chaser, you may never capture it (if you do, what next?!)

    Can I have a cookie please?

    Becky x

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  2. Yes I believe you can find happiness and you can find joy in the most unusual of circumstances and places, as well as positives.
    It's an emotion after all which you have to learn to allow yourself to feel. You can also learn acceptance of yourself and your emotions which will lead to experiencing them which includes happiness.
    A bit long winded but I hope it makes sense, and it is after all just my opinion !
    Keep your chin up
    Sharon x

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  3. I swear I have not been speaking to Sharon!(Re, our conversation this morning!)DBT would be proud!!! Acceptance is not defeatist, only when you accept can you change things. Acceptance is not condoning. So I say; accept yourself above all and you will free yourself.(you might even see what others see in you! Just saying! :) )
    Love, your mum. xxx

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  4. In my experience acceptance frees you from fretting over things that 'are' and this then gives you the headspace to apply your imagination to how you would like things to change, if at all.
    Can I choose which type of cookie? Obviously I'll accept it if you only have one pack to share but my imaginings are veering towards white chocolate and macadamia nut as an ideal outcome ;-)
    Xxxx

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  5. Sometimes I think too much expectation of someone or something can ultimately lead to dissatisfaction and unhappiness. In life very little is perfect but too often we think it should be and as a result we become unhappy and frustrated when it isn't. There's nothing wrong with aspirations and dreams, who doesn't have them? But I think sometimes we set ourselves such unachievable goals that we're bound to be upset and disappointed when they don't quite work out. I think the most important thing any of us can do is to learn to love ourselves with all our imperfections. Not in any egotistical way I hasten to add! If we can't be kind and understanding and loving towards ourselves and accept that we're not perfect and that's OK how can we ever extend real kindness/understanding /love to others? Running after the next new thing never really makes us happy or content, not in the long run, but it seems to be the way of the West and, increasingly, the developing nations. Everyone wanting more, bigger, better. Being able to appreciate what we have is so simple but so hard to achieve in the world we live in. Be kind to yourself. Love yourself. Give yourself a break when life doesn't quite go to plan. Don't strive to 'be happy'. Let happiness find you - playing music, watching the birds through the window, pegging out the washing (that's my mum in laws), walking along the beach in the rain. That's my take on it anyway! Lisa x

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  6. Sorry, I may have gushed there. can I still have a cookie? x

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  7. Really enjoying your blog Hannah......I get to it every few days.........what a brave heart you have......

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  8. Yeah, what Lisa said :-D xx

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  9. I agree with Lisa you should love what you have and that should not stop you aspiring to or wanting more.Take children you would love your children and that would not stop you loving another, or beer, you should love the beer in your hand but that should not stop you loving a beer in your other or unfulfilled hand.
    You should not think this applies to every thing in life. For instance you should not love your wife or partner while aspiring to or loving another. Don't ask me why its just true OK. Loved your blog but I am aspiring.............

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  10. Hi Han, hope you are ok. No, I hadn't spoken to your mum for a while, sorry if I was too wordy or DBT speak.... (sorry!) just be yourself, you are a good and wise person so trust yourself more. You have achieved a lot and done things that many have and could not do. We are all different.
    Love the blog and sending you a BIG hug.
    Sharon x
    P.S. Can I still have a cookie please ?? I'll buy the tea !

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  11. I think you can't dictate what you love,it comes at you from different places.the important thing is that you shouldn't feel bad if you don't love something that you think you should.I love you and there's not a god damn thing you or I can do about it.

    Now if that doesn't get me a cookie we're going to have a problem



    Mmmmm I like cookies,I don't love them,but I don't feel bad when I eat them

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  12. One of the things I love..... Is how you have evoked this conversation! I love everyones viewpoints and the fact that they are sharing them with you... why is that, do you think? We will talk about that when I see you young ladle! Oh, I also quite like cookies but not as much as the Cookie Monster, (aka Unky Asa) does! love you! mum xxx

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